| INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS IN ISLAM Prof. Dr. Mahmud Es'ad COSAN Dear Brothers and Sisters! I would like to thank all
of you for attending the talk. May the peace, mercy and abundance
of
Allah be with you. Praise be to Allah.
Peace and blessings be on His beloved Prophet. May Almighty Allah
place
us among those whom He loves. May He grant us the intercession of
the
Prophet on the Day of Judgment. Human relations,
interpersonal relations take up a wide field. It encompasses all
of the
relationships among human beings. The human relations begin
in the family where each person is born. Interactions between the
parents
and children, among children and between husband and wife are
included.
These relations exist in family that is the smallest social unit.
Islam
brought important jurisdictions on these relations. There are
instructions
and recommendations given by our
beloved Prophet SAS. There are people that we
are related through our parents or through our marriages. We have
blood
relationships (qarābat) with our
relatives through our parents. The relatives through marriages
are
categorized as non-blood relationships (sihriyyat).
When a man marries a woman, then a relationship is established between
each of
them and the blood relatives of the spouse. There are rules and
regulations concerning these relationships in Islam. There are
also
recommendations of the Prophet on the issue. Then, there are
interactions among Muslims as Muslims who do not have any blood ties or
marriage ties. There are ethical rules for these interactions. There are relations
originating from the proximity in living places. We call them
neighbor-to-neighbor relations. You may have a next-door neighbor
or
neighbors living in the same building. There are also regulations for
the
neighborhood relationships. There are also interactions
among people who live in the same community or society. There are human
interactions at work, in business, in arts, and in all fields.
Each one
can be studied and the rules governing each type of interaction can be
written.
There are rules for the
interaction among people who share a common place. The
cleanliness of the
place, how people get along in these places and other issues are
governed by
these rules. These are called muāsharat
ādāb (rules of social behavior, etiquette). There are interactions with
the neighboring nations that may have some enmity towards
Muslims. It
could be a state of peace or war. The title of the talk is so
inclusive
that we could talk years over this topic. Yet from the technique
of
composition, wide topics are not preferred because one cannot go into
the
details and have to be
content with an overview only. Despite the shortcoming of an
inclusive
topic, it is an interesting topic. It is an interesting topic
because we have to establish a bridge between the life and code of
conduct of
the Prophet and our present life. There are so many things for us
to
learn from the life of the Prophet. We learn everything from the
Prophet,
and a good connection has been established already. The code of
conduct
of the Prophet and our human relations have been linked to the topic of
this
talk. I would like to thank the brothers who organized this talk.
If we look at the general
structure of Islam with the approach of a scientist, we observe that
Islam pays
amazingly great importance on social matters and issues concerning the
community and society. In this aspect, it is quite different from
other
faiths. It looks as though Islam is a religion for
communities.
Community life is encouraged in Islam. A person may ask himself:
"Should I live at a mountain alone? Should I isolate myself from
the
society? Should I live in the community?" Islam prefers the life in
the community and encourages it. In previous ummahs, living away
from the
society had been encouraged. That is why you see monasteries and
other
houses of worship on top of the mountains. They tried to improve
themselves by staying away from the society. That is called ruhbaniyyat (monastic life). There is a hadith that
prohibits the monastic life: (Lā
rehbāniyyete fil islām). Running away from the society is not
acceptable in Islam. When a person is among
people, he could be involved in some problems, troubles, hardship or
some sort
of injustice. He has to cope with all these troubles with
patience.
It is better than living in isolation. This is a principle in
Islam. There are also ahadith indicating that people who live in
cities
will enter paradise 500 years before the people who are of the same
caliber yet
live in villages or in isolation. This is because there is
knowledge, congregation and friendship in cities or towns and the
villages lack
these. That is why the good deeds are rewarded more. This
has
encouraged people to move from uncivilized regions to civilized
regions.
This is one of the differences between Islam and previous beliefs. When you study the
jurisdiction on rewards and offenses, you can see clearly that Islam
rewards
even the smallest deeds towards improving the community life and
providing
people peace and comfort. Amazingly great rewards are due for
such deeds.
On the contrary, any mischief that would disturb the peace and
tranquility in
the society is considered as an offense and discouraged. Greeting is an example for
this. We greet one another with "As-salaamu
alaikum!" This greeting is a very rewarding deed. Our
beloved Prophet encouraged this very much: "Say salaam to everybody
even
if you do not know the person." Once our beloved Prophet
was with his companions. Somebody joined them saying "As-salaam
alaikum!" The
Prophet commented: "He earned 10 rewards." Then another person
arrived and said, "As-salaam alaikum
wa rahmatullah!" The Prophet said, "He earned 20
rewards." Yet another person arrived and greeted: "As-salaam
alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa
barakatuhu!" The prophet said, "He earned 30 rewards."
When a person joins a
group, he greets them with salaam. When one leaves a group, he
also
greets them with salaam. Some people are not aware of this and
find it
strange. It is a Muslim tradition to say "As-salaamu alaikum!"
upon departing. Greeting with salaam is
different from other greetings such as "good morning" or "good
day." The word salaam has a connection with faith. When we
greet a person as "As-salaamu alaikum," we tell him "May you be in
paradise." It has such an inclusive meaning: "I wish you peace and
tranquility in this life. May your body be healthy and free of
pains and
discomfort. May Almighty Allah place you to the abode of peace in
the
hereafter." Islam is aware of how a
person is educated--there is a gradual progress from words to the pith,
from
the form to the spirit, from outside to the inside. That is why
the form
has significance. As the person performs a deed in a special
form, the
essence manifests gradually. As a person continues greeting with
salaam,
love and affection result. Islam encourages love and
affection.
Love, affection and friendship towards fellow believers have great
rewards in
Islam. As Imam Ghazzali indicated
in his book Ihya-u-Ulumiddin, our beloved Prophet SAS stated:
"There are certain deeds that are not formal worship, yet they have
great
rewards." For instance, daily salat is a formal worship.
One
has to make wudu and turn to qibla. Then one starts with the
takbir
"Allahu akbar!" It has the ruku and sujud. There are other
things that do not have a specific form and may not be thought of as
worship,
yet they are servitude to Almighty Allah and are given rewards.
One such
deed is the establishment of a friendship in the community. It is
called
"ukhuwwat” i.e., Islamic brotherhood. It has great rewards
and
it is an important worship. "As a Muslim acquires
a new friend--for instance you met somebody today and go to know
him--Almighty
Allah elevates his rank in paradise." There is encouragement to
make
new friends. Actions that strengthens the friendship are encouraged, too. For
instance, inviting people for food, giving gifts, visiting one another,
visiting the sick and alike are rewarding deeds. Our beloved
Prophet
encouraged these deeds and described the rewards for them. I would like to tell you
about an incident that happened in Libya. The leader Qaddafi
invited many
news reporters to Trablus, Libya for propaganda. Some leftist and
rightist
columnists from Turkish newspapers were invited, too. They were
hosted in
a hotel in Trablus. Abdurrahman Dilipak
was one of the columnists who
told
me the story. In the lobby of the hotel, he told the other
guests:
"Do you know that the French Philosopher Roger Garaudy became a Muslim?" Those who were present
there did not believe in what they heard: "You keep telling that
everybody is accepting Islam. You say that an astronaut became a
Muslim,
Captain Cousto became a Muslim, this person became a
Muslim... That
philosopher Roger Garaudy would
not become a Muslim. He is a great philosopher, a leftist, a
great man. He has numerous books, some of which are used as
textbooks in
Moscow. He would not accept Islam. It is a lie." Almighty Allah creates
wonders--the next day Roger Garaudy arrived
in the hotel. He was invited, too. Everybody was
curious if he really accepted Islam. Finally they asked him: "Are you a
Muslim?" "Yes I am. I
have accepted Islam." With a disapproving tone of
voice, one of the leftist columnists asked him: "Why did you become a Muslim?" Roger Garaudy understood what the reporter implied
with these words. He responded in a way that I like very much and
repeat
often: "Look son!
Capitalism made the man a slave for the capital and the boss." As you know, the wild
capitalism gave birth to the communism. The harsh treatment of
capitalism
incurred reactions that led to communism. Roger Garaudy continued: "Communism sacrificed
man to the society." In a communist system, man
has no value--he can be jailed or killed. What matters is the
society. The person as an individual has been neglected and the
society is brought
forward. In capitalism, too, the individual is exploited and
abused. The boss, the capital owner, gets richer and richer. It is
imperialism and exploitation. While the capitalism had made the
individual
a slave for the boss, communism sacrificed the individual for the
society. Roger Garaudy continued: "Islam treats the
individual as a person and values him. That is why I became a
Muslim." Of course, this is a brief
summary of what he said. He is very knowledgeable on the systems and
made the decision as an informed person. Islam establishes an amazing balance in every field. It eliminates the extremes. In Islam, both the individual and the society are important. It does not allow one to abuse the other. In Islam the individual is happy and the society is orderly. Other systems lack that. That is why when Islam is
practiced the way it should be, individuals become happy
spiritually and
remain in peace. They would be healthy physically and mentally,
for Islam
also protects the mind and reasoning. It provides an order in the
family
by ordering duties to the husband and wife. It has regulations on
sexual
relationships. The
social order and happiness are established by Islam, too. All
these are
possible in Islam. No doubt, Islam is the best of the systems as
described by Garaudy. You know that the worship
is individual; it is something between an individual and his
Lord.
Yet the worship that is carried out in congregation has more
reward. For
instance, a person could offer his prayers at his own home and receive
one unit
of reward. But when he offers his prayers in the mosque with
congregation, he
receives twenty-seven units of reward. If the mosque is large so
that
Friday prayers are held inside, then the reward is fifty units.
Twenty-seven is not a small number! Another point that attracts
attention is the following: The daily prayers are a form of
worship. We stand before Allah, recite some verses, make rukū and sujūd (bow-down and
prostrate). Then there is fasting.
For Allah, you stop eating and drinking and be patient whole day.
It is a
form of worship, too. Yet there is Zakat which is also a form of
worship. Zakat is an economical phenomenon. It also has
social and
ethical dimensions. Islam pays great significance to the Zakat
and there
were important incidences during the time of the Prophet. For
instance,
when Hadrat Abubakr-i Siddiq RA became the caliph, some said: "O Abubakr! We
have no problem with salat, declaration of faith (Shahadah),
and fasting
in Ramadan, but do not ask us to pay zakat!" He responded: "Either
you pay the zakat as you paid during the time of the Prophet, or I will
declare
war against you because you do not want to fulfill one of the
obligations Allah
placed on you." The same Abubakr RA,
refused to receive zakat payment from a person who had refused to pay
zakat
during the time of the Prophet and then the Prophet asked the zakat
collectors
not to go to him: "Here o Abubakr, this
is my zakat!" "How could I collect
zakat from a person whom the Prophet did not take the zakat? I
cannot
take it!" The incidence is quite
interesting. When the verse about paying zakat was revealed to
the
Prophet, the person was informed: "A verse instructing
to pay zakat has been revealed. You are required to pay zakat on
you
sheep and camels." They stated the rates. The person
refused
to pay anything. Then the Prophet instructed: "Do not go to
him or ask him for zakat from now on." When the person wanted to
pay zakat, Hadrat Abubakr refused: "No! The Prophet of Allah did
not
take zakat from you, neither can I!"
Of course it is not a matter of money or wealth; he
did not want to get it because the Prophet SAS had instructed that
way.
Yet he wanted to collect zakat as it was paid during the time of the
Prophet. Otherwise, he would declare war against those who
refused to
pay. Let's put all these
aside. Zakat is an economical phenomenon with social
functions. It
is an essential obligation and can be a cause for war. It is such
an important
phenomenon. It does not say: "Well, it is a simple issue.
He
earned the money or wealth by himself, and he can do whatever he wants
with
it." It has a system, a rate. It shows how wonderful Islam
is.
...... May Almighty Allah provide
us with the means to adorn ourselves with the manners of the
Prophet. May
He keep us observant of these principles in our interactions within our
family,
with our relatives, with our neighbors and with our brothers and
sisters in
Islam, in our business, and in our social life.
May Allah be pleased with you. As-Salaamu alaikum wa
rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu! October
24, 1995 --
Hannover/GERMANY
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